Grumpy old fart!!!

"If you talk to God you're religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic."

When I am an old woman

A friend with whom I used to work had this poem on our office wall as a “gentle” reminder, whenever I read it I think of the fun we used to have and it makes me smile.

When I am an old woman

 

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we’ve no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.

I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other peoples’ gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickles for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

by Jenny Joseph

July 30, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Maid, Maids, Retro Lingerie Campaign, Risqué, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Detention

July 30, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Maid, Maids, Risqué, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Gabrielle Ray (Rotary 4170 A)

Perhaps it is egotistic to reblog one of my own posts but I really like this picture of Miss Ray.

It isn’t often that I post the reverse of postcards unless they contain an interesting comment. With this card the reasons are twofold, firstly the recipient lived a short distance from my home town and secondl he had the pleasure of seeing the lady “in the flesh”. However if truth be told I would much  rather have been her dining companion that evening.

 Gabrielle Ray (Rotary 4170 A)

July 29, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Gabrielle Ray, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Carefree

Despite the money daddy spent at the best finishing schools Florence still didn’t act like a lady.

July 29, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Maid, Maids, Risqué, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Style

July 29, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Maid, Maids, Retro Lingerie Campaign, Risqué, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Finishing School

July 29, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Maid, Maids, Risqué, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Babysitting

Samantha was always in demand for babysitting.

Samantha was always in demand for babysitting.

July 28, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Maid, Maids, Retro Lingerie Campaign, Risqué, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Jewish Law

Recently I received the following email from a friend; I found it so amusing that I just had to share it. Orthodoxy has a lot to answer for.

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.  The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet.  It’s funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.  When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination … End of debate.

      I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God’s Laws and how to follow them.

      1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations.  A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians.  Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?

      2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7.  In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

      3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness – Lev.15: 19-24.  The problem is how do I tell?  I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

      4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord – Lev.1:9.  The problem is my neighbours.  They claim the odour is not pleasing to them.  Should I smite them?

      5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath.  Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death.  Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

      6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.  I don’t agree.  Can you settle this?  Are there ‘degrees’ of abomination?

      7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight.  I have to admit that I wear reading glasses.  Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

      8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27.  How should they die?

      9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

      10. My uncle has a farm.  He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend).  He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot.  Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I’m confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman,
Ed.D. Professor Emeritus,
Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education
University of Virginia

(It would be a damn shame if we couldn’t own a Canadian 🙂

July 27, 2010 Posted by | Uncategorized | , | 14 Comments

Gertrude Elliott (Rotary 2378 A)

Gertrude Elliott

July 27, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Gertrude Elliott, Maid, Maids, Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Gertie Millar – Prudence “The Quaker Girl”

Prudence “The Quaker Girl”

July 27, 2010 Posted by | Deltiology, Prudence "The Quaker Girl", Servants, Social History, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment